Pass the peas, and by the way, I banged your wife

For the Week of November 27, 2017
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Pass the peas, and by the way, I banged your wife
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The Spencers are reunited, and they never felt so guilty. Is Steffy that good in bed, or is the Still resurgence all in Bill's other head? From Paris trips to secret trysts and pizza nips, lying is the glue that binds families together this holiday season on B&B.

Happy Thanksgiving, Scoopers! It's that time of year again. It's the time of year when the Forresters invite their beloved and their tolerated to the mansion and pray that Liam doesn't show up with tofurkey and vegan eggnog. He didn't, but Eric invited the Spectra crew, who brought pigs in a blanket to complement the Champagne and caviar.

Pam actually took the tray of piggies with a smile. Amazing, I know. Pam even let Shirley tell her what temperature to reheat them on. I know what temperature Shirley -- bonfire blaze. If Pam doesn't chuck them in the garbage disposal first, those piggy logs are perfect tinder for the Sheila-portrait burning Quinn and Eric talked about recently.

With the way Quinn stashes stuff around the mansion, the cleaning crew is likely to find some unwanted piggies tucked in the sofa cushions -- along with binoculars and bracelets. When Quinn pulled Steffy's bracelet out of the couch and handed it to her, I was like, "What the hell else has Quinn got stashed in that couch? Knowing kinky Quinn, do I really want to find out?"

This Thanksgiving, we saw many of the same faces, and a few new ones. Quinn worked hard to pull together the seating chart. When someone who hardly talks to these folks decides who should sit by each other, they wind up with a cluster-bleep of intersecting love triangles and cheaters at the far end of the table. On the other end, Quinn keeps an eye on Katie and Wyatt. Can you imagine the conversations going on with these people?

Everybody's keeping secrets this Thanksgiving. Even R.J. had a secret. Too bad for him, Darlita spilled his right on the table during the person to the right game. Now he has some explaining to do about missing jewelry from the previous year's collection. But my question is why would he give Spectra ladies Forrester jewelry after Spectra got caught ripping off jewelry and clothing designs?

Charlie kept his Sheila secrets to himself, even when her portrait stared him down from the closet floor. Rick and Maya remained mum about the true intentions behind their Paris offer, even as the Avants and Nicole heaped gratitude upon them for it. "I'm glad you're happy. Just stay away from my child," thought Maya during the whole time Nicole was expressing how grateful she was for the chance to be in Paris.

Zende's enjoying working in Paris so much, he didn't even want to come home for the holiday. Do you notice that Sasha didn't either? I'm not trying to start any rumors. I'm just saying...

Lastly, it is still the best-kept secret in Los Angeles that Wyatt delivers hot pizza to Katie's bedroom in hot pants. No one else is gonna find out about it if Quinn can kill that relationship first. Quinn made herself very clear about her feelings for Katie upon Katie's arrival at dinner. Quinn greeted Katie and said, "Remember, every day is not Thanksgiving." But what about Christmas, Quinn? There are twelve days of that, right?

Let's get two scoops deep in how lying and keeping secrets can bond families better than superglue on the vase you just broke at your mom's house. Here's to your mom and our L.A. faves never noticing all the cracks in the façades this week on the Bold and the Beautiful!

In case you missed it

If you were traveling or preparing for the holiday and didn't catch the latest drama, you can always click on our The Bold and the Beautiful recapsfor a detailed rundown of events. Below is a quick rundown of what went down Thanksgiving week.

Bill gassed up the jet and stocked the yacht to run away Steffy, but Steffy never told him to go catching feelings for her. Steffy's got Bill's nose wide open, but to his embarrassment, she didn't mean to turn him out like that. Steffy begged Bill to forget about their one-night stand because she wants to be his daughter-in-law, not his next wife!

Liam asked Steffy to support him in visiting Bill and asking for a reconciliation. The superglue is still drying on the Spencer family cracks, and Steffy and Bill struggled with their guilty consciences throughout the Thanksgiving meal.

Steffy also had to grind her teeth behind her grin because Eric invited Sally, Shirley, and Darlita to the party. There was no word on where Saul was. I hope he isn't on Skid Row somewhere. I'm just saying, because he was a little too eager to live out of Sally's car with her when she was going to take off after the fire. Steffy never runs out of breath when complaining about what Sally Spectra did to the Forrester family. Now that the Spectras got coveted seats at the Thanksgiving ball, can Steffy still use that complaint?

The Avants and Logans also partook in Charlie and Pam's first-class feast. Pam became an honorary Forrester, but I'd like to know when Pam is gonna become Mrs. Webber. I shouldn't jinx the best couple on the show. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: being single is the key to Pam and Charlie's commitment.

Even though Wyatt's new relationship makes Quinn want to hurl, she seated Wyatt and Katie together. Quinn put Wyatt on Katie's right, probably to hear what the cougar sees in Quinn's son besides sex. Is "collaboration" a secret pizza-delivery code word for sex? I'm asking for a friend.

All I want to do is make love to you

Looks like Bill got himself some Steffy Forrester, and he lost his ever-loving mind. He has been waiting a long time for it, if you believe his story, and after all the coat-busting seductions, rain-drenched kissing, and childhood-bed rolling the two did in the past, they finally exploded together last week. Bill was ready to leave everything behind until Steffy told him to hold his horses because she wouldn't be riding the Stallion again.

Bill was so let down that even looking at "Sky" couldn't bring him back up. It must be true love between Steffy and Liam, because I'll never believe Liam can throw down at the hoedown better than Dollar Bill Spencer -- or Pizza Man Wyatt, either, for that matter. Steffy just joined her mother and Brooke in the Sleep Through a Family Club, but Brooke won't like it one bit that her husband helped Steffy achieve it.

Brooke has lost her touch. First, she came in second to a building. Now, one night with Steffy made Bill forget he's even married. He was painfully reminded of his marriage at Thanksgiving while sitting wedged between his mistress and his wife, who had her "manstress" on the other side of her. Make no mistake, Ridge is definitely stressing Brooke out about being her man.

Bill squirmed in his seat when everyone at the table laughed and cheered about "destiny" for Brooke and Ridge -- as if Bill and Brooke aren't even still legally married. Six months, people. Unless Bill takes off to Nevada again, there must be a six-month delay on destiny -- or "Thornestiny," whichever materializes first.

Like I asked before: can you imagine the dinner conversations with the people at this table if everyone was honest with each other? My guess is that they'd probably go something like this:

Sally: I heard you had a vow renewal ceremony. I guess my kisses and declaration of love to your husband didn't ruin your marriage. That's really great. Not!
Bill: Don't feel bad. Neither did my best sex moves. Nearly threw my back out for nothing.
Brooke: (Squinting) Bill! You better not have done that thing we do. You know...that thing...
Ridge: What thing? You taught him our thing, Logan?
[Brooke starts to neigh, but Bill abruptly cuts her off]

Bill: I did the Quinn thing.
Liam: (Grinning) Oh, yeah. That thing.
Quinn: Are you guys talking about down there?
Wyatt: Why don't I know how to do the thing?
Katie: Oh, you know. You were born with knowing. I mean, that's just a guess. After all, we only collaborate together -- at -- at work.
Quinn: Bucket, please.

According to Bill, he and Steffy might be destiny. After their breakup, he claimed that he had to wedge Liam between himself and Steffy in order to stay loyal to Katie. Bill felt guilty for leaving Steffy to return to Katie, and he thought that he was compensating by giving Liam to Steffy. Bill, could you have at least asked Liam first? I mean, he was in love with Hope at the time, the same Hope who helped you find both your sons. Ungrateful. Just ungrateful.

At the time that Bill picked a side in the Hope/Liam/Steffy triangle, I believed that Bill was trying to help Steffy because he felt guilty for dumping her. And Bill also disliked the prissy little virgin Hope more than anything. You never could have convinced me that he was pushing Steffy on his son so that he'd stay faithful to Katie, though. Could it really be true that Bill has loved Steffy all along, or is the under-used junk in Bill's trunks doing the talking?

The miracle sex Steffy whipped up on Bill apparently made him forget all about how in love he'd been with Katie and all the sand and camels passion between him and Brooke. But I guess we knew Brooke was losing her touch when Bill didn't even mention her in the list of his favorite things when they were newlyweds in Monte Carlo last summer.

Bill revealed to Steffy his belief that Liam isn't the man for Steffy that he'd thought Liam would be. Bill believes that Steffy sacrifices who she is to be with Liam. This is not news. We scoop all the time about how different Liam and Steffy are, how different their morals are, and how much they do not have in common.

What's news to us is that Bill watched Liam deprioritize Steffy to other women again and again and again, but he just now decides Steffy is too good for Liam? Maybe it's a case of Liam and Bill each becoming fed up with the other at the same time. Liam got fed up with Bill getting over on people all the time, and Bill got fed up with Liam having that crotch rocket to himself.

I might buy that Bill was suffering in silence, pining for Steffy while he was back with Katie, but he wasn't even thinking about the single Steffy when Katie mind-screwed him into thinking he wanted Brooke. Bill played out his obsession for Brooke, dabbled in some Quinn, but he went back to Katie, not to Paris to pick up the woman Liam was no longer even interested in.

After awhile, Bill went right back to chasing after Brooke when Katie had another mental crisis. Now he's dabbling in some Steffy like he dabbled in Quinn. With Quinn, it was purely sexual. With Steffy, he's claiming it is emotional. It reminds me a lot of Eric running to every woman he could but winding up right back with Stephanie.

All of Eric's affairs and marriages led right back to Stephanie. Bill could wind up right back with Katie once all the dust settles around these demolished relationships. If Katie is to Bill as Stephanie was to Eric, then Bill and Katie won't escape the cycle until one of them dies.

Maybe that's the reason no one is telling Bill about Katie and Wyatt. Wouldn't you smack Katie right through the TV if she broke off her secret relationship with Wyatt to return to Bill?

For now, Bill agreed to keep what happened between him and Steffy a secret. Will Steffy and Bill's tryst be a one-time thing, or is Bill right about him and Steffy being meant to be together? The fallout between Liam and Bill has to be coming, and so far, it seems to be happening just like some of the other father/son fallouts in the past.

When Ridge and Eric fought over Brooke, Ridge tried to turn Brooke off to him, and she wound up pregnant without knowing if Ridge or Eric was the father. Caroline had her one-night thingy with Thomas; however, it was forced into the open when she had to admit she was pregnant and it couldn't be Ridge's. With Steffy, it looks like the very same thing.

I'm convinced that Steffy is pregnant. It's just a question of by whom. Steffy had better pray she wasn't ovulating with Bill or that she had already gotten pregnant by Liam the previous week. I'm gonna pray that she did not even have sex with Liam after renewing their vows because sex with the father and son in the same night? Grody! I don't care if she had a shower between.

Let us know which way you think the storyline is headed and how you think the secret will come out. Should Steffy and Liam be able to recover from this, or do you think it's time to shake up the couples a bit? If Liam leaves Steffy, does that mean he should hook up with Sally? It might be a natural pathway for the plot because weaksauce Sally is fresh out of bootstraps and needs a hero to help her rebuild Spectra.

The only thing that can make this any more complicated is if Hope Logan returned to town.

Casting News and reel life vs. real life

Well, what do you know? We're in luck. According to soapcentral.com, someone might make Steffy give up her seat at the Thanksgiving table and her title as Mrs. Liam Spencer sooner than we think. Hope Logan will be back in January of the new year. Annika Noelle has been cast as the new Hope Logan, a role Kim Matula vacated in 2016.

According to the sources quoted in our article, writers have decided that Hope has been living in Paris, not Milan, ever since her miscarriage. I wondered why Steffy was babbling something about Hope being in Paris when Steffy was sobbing about Liam's indiscretions the other week. The reason for the rewrite is unclear to me at this time.

Steffy Spencer's marriage might be in jeopardy from all sides, but Jacqueline MacInnes Wood's love life is doing just fine. In fact, soapcentral.com reports that she just announced her engagement to Elan Ruspoli, whom she loves beyond words. Congratulations, and may you have every happiness that Steffy wishes she could get in life and marriage.

In other casting news, don't forget that we're looking forward to Thorne walking back into our lives on Monday.

Thankful for you

On behalf of all of us who work in The Bold and the Beautiful department of Soap Central, happy Thanksgiving and fortuitous shopping. We are honored that you choose us to deliver the news, the scoops, the opinions, and the recaps of our beloved show. May your holiday season be bold and beautiful, baby!

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Two Scoops is an opinion column. The views expressed are not designed to be indicative of the opinions of Soap Central or its advertisers. The Two Scoops section allows our Scoop staff to discuss what might happen and what has happened, and to share their opinions on all of it. They stand by their opinions and do not expect others to share the same point of view.

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